coping with anxiety
A few nights before I was supposed to give a group presentation on a topic, I was informed that I would, in fact, be giving the presentation by myself. I began feeling nervous and felt a sense of impending doom. I imagined myself failing and making a fool of myself. Every time I sat down to prepare, my heart raced, I began to sweat, and I even found myself trembling. I had trouble concentrating, and the worry was ever present. I didn’t find any relief when I tried to sleep, and found myself up all hours of the night. I … More
procrastination
Every day at 9 am, the alarm goes off on my watch reminding me to clean the kitchen. I pause the alarm, telling myself that I will do it later. Later never comes. In fact, I turn off most of my alarms during the day that remind me to put in a load of laundry or run to the pharmacy. I am a master procrastinator who waits for the last minute to accomplish most daily tasks. This is a major source of stress in my life. I am the mom who washes her children’s laundry at 12 am on Sunday … More
The Epigenetics of parenting: Molecular biology of stress, mental health, resilience, and intergenerational trauma
The gender reveal party is over. The baby shower has left the mother-to-be with baby clothing, diapers, and books on how to be a good parent. All that is left is to wait for the baby to arrive. This is a time of reflection about how to be the best parent possible to the new life about to be born. Parents contemplate their own upbringings and how they will be different for their children. Being a good parent is important to creating happy, healthy adults who are successful in their lives. It seems the success and failure of their children … More
Shades of Life
Disclaimer: This article contains references to disturbing childhood experiences. Reader discretion is advised. Fear is a powerful emotion that shapes our behavior and can dictate the way that we live our lives. For those of us trapped in a cycle of fear, the pain can be relentless. I have lived with fear since early childhood, dodging its grasp and seeking a safer place. I am afraid to sleep, to be alone in my house, or to drive my car at night. My fear is deep-rooted in the memory I have of a night when I was young and robbed of … More
A season of loneliness
A few years ago, I left my dream job. My work was fulfilling and rewarding. I had great relationships with my co-workers, but my boss was toxic. One day my boss would give me gifts and compliment my abilities. The next day she would threaten to fire me. Her moods rose and fell like the tides and her tirades were inescapable. After a particularly bad exchange with her, I chose self-preservation and handed in my letter of resignation. Instead of searching for another job, I decided to spend some time with my family and to take care of projects around … More
Autism Spectrum Disorder: Neurodiversity in Modern Times
My son, Michael, was diagnosed with autism when he was 17 years old. For years, I had that nagging feeling that something wasn’t quite right, but I didn’t know who to go to with my concerns. Michael used to come home from school every day and draw a map of the state of Minnesota by memory. He worked for hours to include lakes, counties, and major highways. After he proudly finished, he would take a new piece of paper and start again. He was obsessed by the Muppets and crayons, and spent hours creating bus lines on the carpeting in … More
